I really enjoyed reading that, Matt. 

Reading the subsequent discussion, it occurs to me that it might lend itself to a trilogy of POVs - Beaver's - expanded or not as thought necessary - Virginia's and Straker's all exploring a back story that might be centred around Beaver's or might be centred around whatever is preoccupying each of them at that moment.

Straker's preoccupation is sure to be what happened on Moonbase, Beaver's as above and Ginny's... what might she have been focussed on as she came out of the lift? Then their points of view would coalesce. Or even include a subsidiary character like Cooper - the "attitude" that he seems to give Beaver might have a story attached but what is in Cooper's head (good or bad!) might be quite different to what Beaver perceives. If you see what I mean.

Anyway, it was nice to get a minor character's role fleshed out a bit. Nicely done. 

Erm - as I don't write, I know I can't set challenges but has anyone ever set out to write a sympathetic "in the mind of" for Rutland? Always in the shadow (snigger) of The Husband Who Went Before Him, always seeing the father in John, perhaps John indicating that Rutland can never match up to Dad. Then watching Mary take special care with her makeup and dress on the weekends she will see Straker when he collects / drops John off.

So much potential to completely re-write a much maligned character.

 

 

That's a brilliant idea Normandie! I agree with Denise. If you ever want to try your hand but are afraid to put your first draft out, I would certainly be willing to look it over for you, and I'm sure there are others here that would do the same thing.

And who says a reader can't issue a challenge? : What do you think Deb?

I didn't paint him badly in my story Full Circle.  A bit dull, perhaps, but very devoted. 

Quote:

If you like mysteries in a small English village, police procedurals, try Caroline Graham's Inspector Barnaby novels. They made a TV series from her stuff. I was watching one of the episodes last night to relax. Barnaby's partner is Troy, and oh god he's funny! He's a great policeman but his personality is so much fun. Think a blend of Paul Foster and Casanova but in his own head.   
Barnaby's a family man with a genius for solving the murder mysteries, he's also on a diet, (I feel his pain, I am too ) great sense of humor, and he barely tolerates Troy. Troy fancies that HE is the great one in the partnership
In one scene Troy is suggesting that if a reporter goes out with him, she will get inside information on the murder Barnaby's investigating. She informs him he said that before, he did the same thing previously then dumped her, and she tells him where he can go with his 'inside information' 
Troy's lovable but totally clueless, pun intended!

I really like your revision now Matt, it makes Beaver truly come alive, a real person and adds to what we really know about him from the scene.  I thought the name Beaver might have been his nickname in the service. In the brief time I was in the U.S. Air Force reserves, out at the Travis air base, people tended to use only your last name or a nickname you'd be stuck with. Because of a serious health problem I wasn't able to stay long enough to have the questionable experience of being given a nickname. 

I have to say, I really like the idea of writing this story from three points of view, Beaver's, Virginia's, and Ed's. One down two to go. Maybe I'll get back to it once I finish the two stories I'm working now. I really need to get my muse to stay focued.

Thanks to everyone for their comments and support!